The Native Iowan

An island tale…

In classic “island extended family” style bigB and his wife, K, raised, educated and managed all of her 6 younger siblings.

Always known simply as bigB, he was a Dude. Big n strong. Hard working. A guy worthy of admiration.

K was a Babe. An ex-beauty pageant winner. She was the eldest of a large family that had seen their father die, and then their mother pass, while the kids were still quite small. K was the caregiver of all, and when she and bigB married, their ready made family was part of the deal.

B and K had 2 sons to add to the brood. K’s 6 siblings counted 3 girls and 3 boys.

B and K worked and toiled and lived and loved. Their brood was raised working hard, being smart, never being lazy. I always and all ways admired B and K.

About 10years ago bigB fell quite ill. Well into his 70s by then, we were all warned that bigB’s time may well be up.

In and out of hospital. Numerous “treatments”. We all watched as bigB withered, shrunk, aged. It was a tough time for all close to the family.

At one point, at one very dark point, bigB decided he was not going to live much longer. A guy that had lived his life on his terms, a no compromise kinda guy to the end, big B decided he was going to “confess all” before he went to meet his maker.

The Family got called together for the “final blessing” from bigB. Time was short. It was an important time for all involved.

On his Death-Bed, bigB confessed to all that he and K’s youngest sister, Dee, had been having an ongoing affair since she was a teen.

Not an abusive affair. A loving, caring sexual, hidden affair that had been ongoing for over 30years. Hidden and unknown by any but bigB and Dee. A shared secret. Hidden meetings, innocuous trips that were not what they appeared to be, up until very recent times. All had been transacted under the watchful and trusting eye of the Family.

By this time Dee was well married with a number of kids.

With tears and histrionics and the Family listened partook in bigB’s confession.

It was very hard on everyone. K was devastated. She felt terribly betrayed by both her husband and her sister. The other siblings all had a stance, an opinion, something to say, to add to the confusion. All suffered some form of hurt if not betrayal by bigB’s confession.

It took a lot for bigB to make his admission to the Family. To profess his guilt and to ask for understanding, if not forgiveness. He got strength for it all from his illness, his impending death, his need to “come clean” before he shook his mortal coil off.

That was about 10 years ago.

And as of today, 30/12/25, bigB is still alive.

And K is still angry.

Might be some sort of lesson buried in here somewhere…

One more day before 2026…